Why a blog?

I give up, easily.
Anything. Everything.
Because of a lack of confidence.

People won't like me, laugh at me, think I'm stupid.
That is why my entire life I hid away, in dark clothes.
Black, dark blue or grey.
Anything to make me invisible.

I never used make-up in high school because I didn't know how.
My hair was always the same because I had no idea what to do with it (ponytail, tightly pulled back, in case you're curious).

When I was 18 I got married and I wanted a change.
I wanted the real me to come out.
But I still had no clue how.

At 26 I started this blog.
So that I wouldn't give up, wouldn't forget where I was going.

This is my journey, feel free to walk it with me, every step of the way.
All my failures, all my mistakes.
But also my winnings, my happy moments and my bliss.
I'll be honored to have you with me.


PersonalPosted by Fashiondisaster Wed, December 30, 2015 12:08:27
So hard to get,
So easy to lose,

When do we really ever trust someone?
What does it take to earn the trust?
And how do we keep it?

When we go shopping,
We tend to trust the sales person,
To give us the correct information.

About garanti,
How something works,
If something looks good on us,
Or about how much we need it.

What did they do to earn our trust?
They just work there.

Then how come,
Trusting people in ordinary life,
Tends to be so much harder?

People we see everyday,
Because we work with them,
Or because they are family,
Need to put in so much more effort,
Why is that?

Even friends,
Are frequently put under a magnifying glass,
Why did she say that?
What did she really mean?
Was her boyfriend really staring at me?
And why does that flatter me?

I think,
The reason is,
We see our friends and family,
As a competition,
We don't mean to,
But it sneaks in.

Without us realizing it,
Because sure,
We are happy,
When somebody we know well gets a big promotion,
But it also makes us sad,
Because we didn't get it.

And then we tend to overthink things,
When we were younger,
Didn't she always get the pretty guy?

I have trust,
Most of the time,
In a small group of people,
So far,
None of them has let me down,
But when the time comes that they do,
I don't think that it will matter all that much.

And maybe that is the real trust,
Finding your tribe,
And trusting that they are all you need,
Whether they do what you expect them to do,
Or not,
And most of the time,
They exceed your expectations.

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