Fashiondisaster

Fashiondisaster

Why a blog?

I give up, easily.
Anything. Everything.
Because of a lack of confidence.

People won't like me, laugh at me, think I'm stupid.
That is why my entire life I hid away, in dark clothes.
Black, dark blue or grey.
Anything to make me invisible.

I never used make-up in high school because I didn't know how.
My hair was always the same because I had no idea what to do with it (ponytail, tightly pulled back, in case you're curious).

When I was 18 I got married and I wanted a change.
I wanted the real me to come out.
But I still had no clue how.

At 26 I started this blog.
So that I wouldn't give up, wouldn't forget where I was going.

This is my journey, feel free to walk it with me, every step of the way.
All my failures, all my mistakes.
But also my winnings, my happy moments and my bliss.
I'll be honored to have you with me.


Humans

PersonalPosted by Fashiondisaster Tue, January 10, 2017 22:29:55
Today,
Was a hard day,
I had to attend a lesson,
That I didn't want to attend,
And it had been stressing me out,
For days,
Reaching it's peak,
This morning.

It made me cranky,
And vulnerable,
But I had to go to work,
Dealing with older people,
Can feel like being a psychologist,
Sometimes.

Today,
I wasn't feeling it,
Dealing with my own problem,
Like I had the world on my shoulders,
And I just had a feeling of,
Leave me alone.

When it was almost noon,
And time to take my break,
A last customer walked in,
Ten minutes before closing,
And it wasn't a favorite one.

I took a deep breath,
And tried to handle it in a fast,
But polite manner.

He wouldn't let me,
Do it fast,
He wanted attention,
Preferably,
A lot of it.

So I guided him to my computer,
To adjust his hearing devices,
He kept asking questions,
Like he always does,
And then he started talking about his wife,
How she was being moved,
From a hospital,
To a care center.

I felt like,
Emotionally,
I couldn't deal with it,
Thinking about that lesson I was dreading,
Feeling the adrenaline.

And suddenly,
It hit me,
A little voice in my head,
Telling me to look at him,
Really look at him as a person,
A soul,
A human,
That was troubled.

And I shifted,
My problems weren't more important than his,
We are all human,
And every problem we have,
Hanging over our heads,
Big or small,
Needs,
No,
Deserves help,
Even if it's just a listening ear,
Or a kind word.

So I did,
I listened,
Smiled,
Comforted,
And gave him kind words.

I still dreaded my lesson,
But I hope,
I made his day better,
Even it was just for a little,
Tiny,
Bit.





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